No Pain

you see no mark upon my skin
you see no tear in my eye
you see no sign of pain
therefor I must not be in pain

I must not cry myself
to sleep at night
or wake up screaming
because of haunted dreams
I must not pull the blade
across my skin
and hope that one day
it drives in deeper
I must not fear the darkness
or shudder at the thought of silence
I must not hide myself from
life and prying eyes that
judge your worth as a person
upon the shine of your smile

you hear no gasp escape my mouth
you hear no horror tale from my past
you hear no words of pain
therefor I must not be in pain

I must not scream so loud it's silent
or throw things against my
bedroom walls
I must not kick and scream
and punch things that no one else can see
I must not drown myself
in the brown bagged bottle
in the hopes that i will forget
or tie the rope around my neck
and pray i find the courage to
pull it tighter


you don't see or hear my pain
therefor you think i feel no pain
you see what I choose for you to see
you hear what I choose for you to hear
you know not what he did to me
you know not what she did to me
you know not what you did to me
you know not the pain I feel
you know only what I want you to know
but just because you do not see or hear it
does not mean that the pain is not there
locked away inside of me, where it will always be